I Fell Off The Wagon!!!  Part One


It happens. I’m human… Writer’s Block and life got the best of me…

It happens.  I’m human.  When I started this blog, I promised myself if I didn’t write shit that was authentic, genuine, honest, and real I wouldn’t write shit at all!  Hence my 2 ½ week hiatus writer’s block and life just got the best of me.   What can I say…? But I’m back!

So… I fell off the wagon.  After all of my growth, insight, wisdom, and discernment, I reverted back to a 23 year old fool!  Smh!  Here is my confession of my own foolery!

Back in December my close girlfriend and her husband had a Christmas party.  IT wasn’t just any ordinary Christmas party.  This was a high end extravaganza!  They decorated their estate… yes I said estate to the nines in the classiest, chicest Christmas decorations, there was an abundance of gourmet food, a bartender was mixing drinks with premium liquors and high end wines, and their was a great mix of guests.  It was a wonderful evening.  I didn’t plan on meeting anyone.  Trust me, I’m used to going to these Holiday parties solo.  And Don’t cry for me Argentina.  I say that with contentment.  Like I said, I am in a place where I am truly enjoying my Singledom and it feels so good!  Anyway, I’m digressing… My point, I didn’t go to this event planning on meeting ANYONE.  I went with the full intention of enjoying the food, drink, and company.

To my surprise while having a conversation with one of my girlfriend’s guests, I looked up and there stood an extremely attractive man.  He had to be at least 6’5, he had a low cut fade, well groomed facial hair.  If you looked up MONIQUE’S IDEAL MAN APPEARANCE his picture would come up immediately!  We caught each other’s eyes and he smiled at me revealing a set of perfectly straight white teeth.  And of course I gave him my million dollar mega watt smile back (for those who are new to this blog I might sound completely narcissistic, but if you don’t toot your own horn… damn it who will?)  Just as I was doing cartwheels internally a young woman walked up next to him and handed him a drink.  DAMN!  Of course he was with someone!  Why in the world would Murphy’s Law let me have the story line of “I met my husband when I least expected it…”  Although that seemed to be the bullshit story all these other women who were in new relationships were trying to sell.  I know I sound cynical…  Of course that wouldn’t be the case for me.  My inner loving diva consoled me, Keep your head up.  At least your girlfriend made sure she has plenty of bottles of your favorite wines.   SO I continued enjoying the wine and conversation of a fabulous Holiday party and kept my distance from the attractive man.


And I could also tell that if he told her he wanted to date her she would be joining my internal gymnastics team and be doing cartwheels too!

When going back to the massive gourmet food to get my 10th plate of food I bumped into Dreamboat and his date.  They introduced themselves to me.  I discovered “Aaron” was from the Midwest.  He handled Hedge Funds for a major financial company.  And his date was my girlfriend’s husband’s manicurist.  And as a side note… no I do not find anything wrong with a well groomed man.  As long as he doesn’t have a clear coat of polish on that completely acceptable.   I found that to be an interesting combination.  Call me a snob… Hell, I’ll call myself a snob.  But how in the hell would an educated successful man, be hooked up with a manicurist?!  So I asked the question as tactfully as I could.  Hell I was nosey and wanted to get the Tea!

Me:  How long have you two been together?

Aaron and Manicurist: (in unison) We are JUST friends!

Me:  Really?  Well you know what they say about friends.  They  make the best relationships.

Now you already know I was just making conversation.  I was actually doing more internal cartwheels when they told me the news.  And when they said it in unison “Aaron” slightly turned off by the idea and The Manicurist just shook her head.

The Manicurist:  He’s like a brother to me.  We would never date.

Although she said that, any other woman knows when another woman isn’t being honest with herself.  I could totally tell she liked him. And I could also tell that if he told her he wanted to date her she would be joining my internal gymnastics team and be doing cartwheels too!  But hey, that’s not my problem and this woman wasn’t my friend.  And I specifically asked them if we were dating and they both adamantly denied it!  So I believe in taking people for their word.

The Manicurist went off to get another drink and “Aaron” stayed there and we continued to talk.  I found out he was 43 years old, had never been married but had a 7 year old daughter.  He literally lived down the street from me.  Then we started talking about relationships and work life balance.

Aaron:  Maybe you could help me with work life balance.  I have a tendency to be bad with that.

Me:  It has to be a conscious effort.  You have to have a life or you’ll miss moments.

Aaron:  I wouldn’t want to miss any moments with you…

Such a corny ass line.  So cheesy.  But between the drinks and looking up to his 6’6 build I didn’t give a shit.  I was enjoying the moment.

Aaron:  Here’s my card.  My cell phone is on it.  Please give me a call.  As a matter of fact, send me a text right away so I have your number.

Me:  Sure.  I’ll do that. 

In an effort to not risk becoming a Stage 5 clinger, I circulated through the party.  Throughout the evening I would catch him checking me out.

Before “Aaron” and the manicurist left the party, he came over and gave me a hug.  As he hugged me he reminded me to send him the text.  He said it loud enough for The Manicurist to hear it.  So it wasn’t like he was being sneaky.

Of course the usual happens when you meet someone a a friends party during the after party clean up.  I call it the Aftermath.

Girlfriend:  So what was the deal with you and that guy?  He couldn’t stop staring at you all night. 

Me: He seemed cool.  At first I thought he was with the Manicurist.

Girlfriend:  I don’t think so.  Did you exchange numbers?

Me:  He gave me his card and asked me to text him my info.  But I’ll wait until tomorrow.

Girlfriend:  Why would you do that?

Me:  I don’t want to seem pressed. 

Girlfriend:  Are you crazy?!  There’s a lot of woman who aren’t pressed sitting around still SINGLE.  You better text that man and stop playing games!

ME:  You know what… You’re right!

Text Messaging

Why is it when you like a guy you become so self conscious about everything you do? From leaving a text to leaving a voice mail… it’s not a simple task.

I went into the guest bedroom and grabbed my phone.  You know you have a great girlfriend when they make it a point to give you your own room in their house so you never have to worry about driving home under the influence.  I grabbed my phone.  Why is it when you like a guy you become so self conscious about everything you do?  From leaving a text to leaving a voice mail… it’s not a simple task.  after several rough drafts I settled with:

It was great meeting you tonight.  Here’s my info.

Within seconds “Aaron” responded:

It was great meeting you as well.  I look forward to keeping in touch and getting to know you more.


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